"Haunted by the past" is a commonplace phrase because it's a commonplace experience. Even if one is not, strictly speaking, "haunted," the past is perpetually with one in the present, and the longer it grows and the further it recedes the stronger its presence seems to become. I agree with the Chekhov character who, when, in a crisis, he is reminded that "this, too, shall pass," responds, "Nothing passes."
--Philip Roth, in the recent New Yorker interview
Lots of depression this weekend. Fortunately, Rachel called this morning and invited me to go apple and raspberry picking with her and Frances. Unfortunately, dogs are not allowed in the picking fields, so I didn't actually pick anything, but it was good to get out. Then they came over and helped me clear away some more boxes, and put the table and chairs up in the dining room. That was a huge accomplishment.
Ordered digital tv today. Tired of just watching Channel 8. $33 for the first three months, then $45 or something. I think it comes with some music channels which I need cause I can't get NPR stations clearly on any of my radios out here. A big disappointment.
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Summer continues into Fall. A favorite time of year for me. I thoroughly identify with your grief--too much loss in too short of a time. i am so sorry that you are having such a negative exerience. Often it is the price of change--welcome or not. The teakettle is beautiful. How does it work? Know that the sorrow is recognized. Finding good furniture is a plus. Hope things look up for you in the not so distant future. Love, CSA
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